Who am I?

photo Christine Bélanger

Hello and welcome to my blog.

I am a clinical sexologist in private practice. I work with individuals, couples, I present workshops to various groups and I lead therapy groups in sexual addiction. My office is located in Old Montreal. I work in English and French.

Several aspects of sexuality challenge me but about my favourite topic is without a doubt, sexual desire. It’s always a challenge for me to work with this issue. Whether its lack of sexual desire in the couple or hyper sexuality, I like to support people looking for a more satisfying sexuality.

This blog will serve as a reflection on my private practice as a sexologist and I will also let you know what I think is important or useful to know. I have various areas of interest including: policy, public health, management of sex offenders, sex education, hyper sexuality, sex industry, substance abuse, child abuse, neglect, resilience.

As part of my work, I treat many conditions including:

  • Sexual compulsivity: cybersex, compulsive masturbation, porn, compulsivity with escorts; compulsive seduction;
  • Disorders of desire: sexual aversion, loss of sexual desire;
  • Sobriety and sexuality;
  • Couples: marital discord, infidelity, jealousy;
  • Sexual dysfunctions: anorgasmia, premature ejaculation, delayed ejaculation, pain during sex, etc.
  • Gender dysphoria;
  • Evaluation and therapy for Trans population
  • Lecture to many groups (schools, employee’s program, etc)

I like being a sexologist, I like meeting people and witness the changes that occurs when they get better.  Sex therapy gives me that privilege.

Sexuality includes three components: the emotional, the relational component and the sexual aspect. When the three parts are well balance, it is easier to find a partner and to form an healthy relationship. Sometimes one may master sexual techniques but lack the ability to be in a fulfilling relationship.

My main interest in sex therapy focuses on desire disorders:  from sexual addiction to sexual aversion (intense dislike). The libido is a vital energy that is unique to each of us. It connects us to ourselves, our essence, and it connects us to others.

I foremost believe that people are always searching to feel better and they are looking to enhance the quality of their lives. Books, televison shows, Internet, friends, relatives, teachers and family are molding our way of being who we are. Some encounters can change us to better loving and caring persons while some people, places, situations or mistakes we made may dramatically put us in the shadow.  If you are in the dark, there are many of us who can help. If you tried to reach out and no one answered, keep reaching out until someone hears you.

The following are a short description of the main approaches I use. They serve me as a guideline.  Nevertheless, my main focus is on you. If you are willing to trust me and help me understand you, we can work together.

Some studies made showed that the most important tool in therapy is YOU: How much time & efforts you are willing to put into your cure? How good and caring  and trusting your therapist is to you? You may want to answer these questions before you start your therapy.

Cognitive behavioural approach:  Treatment for sexual problems focuses on negative thoughts and behaviours which are obstacles to healthy sexual expression. From this perspective, the sexual problem is understood as the issue to be treated rather than a symptom of an underlying problem. The therapeutic process is suitable for individuals and couples and generally involves exercises such as relaxation techniques, body sensory awareness, desensitization of exaggerated sexual worries/anxieties, and therapeutic self-stimulation.

Systemic approach: This approach is influenced by the principle that sexuality is experienced within a relationship. During therapy, the partners discover the specific type of system that they have developed in their relationship, their communication skills, their intimacy level and their sexuality. Communication is the key to change in the systemic approach. Treatment involves exercises in which both partners learn new ways of communicating and being sexually intimate together. Sessions are mainly conducted with both partners; however, individual sessions are scheduled as necessary.

Sexocorporal approach: This holistic approach integrates body, sensations, emotions, symbols and awareness in its understanding of treatment of sexual problems. Treatment involves developing or enhancing subjective body awareness in order to facilitate sexual functioning and expression. Working with the body allows access to blockages and deep emotions, thus allowing modifications to psychological and emotional aspects.

Sometimes in the course of our practice, it can be possible that we ask you to see a doctor concerning certain dysfunctions like: vaginal pain, inability to have or to keep an erection, etc. It is always important to look at the medical conditions that might cause a sexual dysfunction. These same conditions can sometimes be caused or enhanced by anxiety, fatigue, and stress but not always. It is important to separate medical conditions from psychological conditions.

I have a master degree in sexology from l’Université du Québec à Montréal. I am a member of a few associations:

ASQ: l’Association des Sexologues du Québec;

RIMAS: Regroupement des Intervenants en Matière d’Agression Sexuelle;

CPATH: Canadian Professional Association for Transgender Health.

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2 Comments to “Who am I?”

  1. What’s Happening i’m new to this, I stumbled upon this I’ve discovered It absolutely helpful and it has helped me out loads.
    I am hoping to give a contribution & help other users like its
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    • La fitness,
      Thanks a lot for your kind words. I am happy it is helpful to you.
      If there are any specific topics you would like to read about, let me know,
      I am open to suggestions.
      Have a great day!
      Meriza 🙂

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